


Grunt And His Opponent

by Waenhir



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-03
Updated: 2013-04-03
Packaged: 2017-12-07 09:55:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,028
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/747183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Waenhir/pseuds/Waenhir
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Grunt and a worthy opponent of his showing down each other. Garrus was not impressed. Implied Garrus/Femshap.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Grunt And His Opponent

**Author's Note:**

> Came up with this is the middle of the night, again writing it on my iPhone.

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"I am pure Krogan. You should be in awe!" Grunt barred his teeth and snarled viciously at his opponent. 

His opponent had smirked at Grunt's alpha Krogan short speech. At least Grunt thought he had smirked when he heard it. Aliens. You could never really tell what they were doing with their lips. But it looked like a smirk to Grunt and Grunt was NOT happy. Not happy at all.

"I have fought husks and Geths! I have fought Rachnis! I have brought down a thresher maw on foot! ON FOOT! How dare you stand there with your miserable puny little legs and smirk at Urdnot Grunt!"

Before Grunt could finish his words, his opponent raised up from his crouching position and put his hands forward. Biotics! Grunt ducked immediately. So that was why he was smirking! He was a biotic like that Alenko human and he was going to unleash a warp field on Grunt! Wait, did that Alenko human use warp field? Grunt did not remember. It did not matter. Alenko did not matter. Except maybe if his Battlemaster had allowed him to pull out Alenko's hair and tear him from limb to limb whenever Grunt had the itch to rip things apart. Alenko did not matter. What mattered now was that his opponent was trying to best him with biotics. 

But Grunt was no ordinary Krogan. Grunt was born ready. He might be only a few tens of a month old according to the intergalactic calendar but he was a product of hundreds of years of wisdom and battle-ready experiences. Grunt had fought in the Reaper Wars and had came out of it a hero. He was not about to let this miserable rival of his think he was afraid of a little warp field... although his last encounter with one was not that pleasant.... No. Grunt was not going to think about how unpleasant that warp field was. He was a hero, a leader. He was krantt to the most famous Battlemaster in the universe. Urdnot Grunt was not afraid of a little warp field! he refused to remember that warp field! Instead, he aimed and fired at his opponent from his own hiding place.

His opponent dodged the attacks effortlessly and jumped onto higher ground. Almost immediately, the scorched nemesis proceeded to empty half his body weight of somethings from his pouches. Boobytrapping the place? How despicable!

"I WILL EAT YOU!" Grunt shouted and released a round of attacks from his position. 

The fast pace attacks took Grunt's rival by surprise and he fell backward, squealing a little but twisting and turning himself upright double time. His flexibility would have put even the great Commander Shepard to shame. Taking the opportunity while his opponent was righting himself, Grunt launched a pallets of assault fire at him, sending him scurrying behind a nearby log.

"Heh. Heh. Heh. Heh. You are as incompetent as a Hanar without armor," Grunt sneered. He did not think he had seen Hanars wearing armor and he did not care if it was even a good imagery to use as an insult. It satisfied him and that was all there was. It would show his opponent for trying to boobytrap the place. An insult with Vorchas and grace would be next in line if he dared try anything else. Grunt felt a sense of pride.

But then it kind of all went downhill from there. Well not exactly downhill, maybe just halfway down the hill since Grunt did not exactly care nor did he not....

For as suddenly as Grunt's opponent tucked his head out of the log to surveyed the battleground, he made a small peep sound and ran back into his favorite hiding place. A microsecond later, the door to Grunt's room opened and in walked a very furious Turian with a developing headache.

"Grunt! Will you stop throwing dehydrated Levo peas at the cage!" Garrus shouted. "How many times have I told you not to steal Shepard's hamster?"

"He likes me. I am krantt. The Great Slayer does not like you. so you failed as a mate. The Slayer should eat you."

"It's a space hamster! It always runs and hides and pokes its head out and goes "Wek"! And I am mated to Shepard, not the hamster! And I do not fail! I was the one who found the hamster you stole from your Battlemaster. Every. Single. Time!" Garrus snatched the hamster cage off the table. 

"You talk too much, Turian," Grunt said nonchalantly. 

"And what in the Spirits is the hamster a slayer of?"

"Nuts! What else?" Grunt replied. "Have you not seen the way he destroys the shell of a nut?" He chuckled. "He is a warrior worthy of the Battlemaster."

Garrus shook his head and sighed.

"You're just dying to go down to the cargo hold and spar, aren't you?"

"YES!" 

Grunt pushed past Garrus to the elevator and palmed the down button eagerly.

Garrus followed, holding Grunt's opponent's cage with both talons. The hamster had wondered back out of its hiding place and was purposefully stuffing its cheek pouches with the dehydrated peas that Grunt had thrown into the cage, maybe thinking to stock up for its next encounter with Grunt. It's eyes darted from left to right than upward to see the blue of Garrus' eyes staring down at it. Promptly, it gave a familiar, "Wek!" and scampered right back into its hideout. The Nut Slayer, indeed. At least the hamster now had a name, thought Garrus. Then and only then did he wondered if the dehydrated peas might give it the runs. 

The last time the young Krogan had stolen the hamster, he had built it a fortress with Levo lettuce leaves which the hamster had so happily devoured. Those leaves had given it diarrhea and Garrus had to take it to Doctor Chakwas. Taking the hamster down to the doctor without Shepard knowing was the easy part. Cleaning the cage was not. Garrus looked up from the now hiding hamster and glared at Grunt.

"If you lose again, Krogan, you are so cleaning The Nut Slayer's abode!"

Grunt snarled.

 

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End file.
